The weekend
Each weekend of the previous two months has delivered some excitement. I recall the one of sledding, another of seeing Narnia and everything else; then was the week before Christmas, then Christmas weekend, New Year's craziness, then Heather, family and Chicago, then Ohio, and finally now...
Friday I got to go flying again. I had to, actually, because my 90-day period the insurance company covers for rental pilots was a week expired, but because of special permission from the FBO's flight instructor, i was allowed to fly anyway. Mom went with me for my 3 required landings, and that was all I did because I can come back later in the next 90 days. The next time i fly, however, it will be on a day when the eastbound runway is active, because when the the winds favor the north-south runway, I have to taxi a MILE each way to and from it! That's like ten bucks spent on renting an airplane that's not flying. How fun is that?
One improvement over the 90 days since i'd flown that airplane was my higher instinct for flying it. I'd spent 150 hours between a Navajo, 310 and Diamond Star, and now my touch and technique with the airplane was more refined, and I could really feel the skills happening naturally.
It seems that when we force our habits to adapt to more strain, we come back to those less demanding situations and find them much easier to cope with. I'm aware that this may illustrate the present state of my life. The strains of an unbalanced life deprived of employment, duty, and apparent motion force me to seek for significance and purpose independent of them. In this adversity, few precious ones have counseled me well, reminding me of what God requires of me and what is the essence of my purpose. In church this morning, we sang the song that paraphrases Jude 1:25: "To the only wise God our Saviour, be glory and majesty, dominion and power, both now and ever. Amen" It is provocative to consider that all the glory, wisdom and power belongs to God; only by His providential grace does he grant it to us, his creatures. We are just stewards of those attributes which are wholly God's own. On earth, we obtain wisdom and strength and honor, but as life itself is a gift, so our acquiring those attributes is a gift. It humbles me that I was and am still under the impression that , because I have lost what invigorated and fulfilled me for the time being, i will be less accepted and esteemed in the hearts of my friends and acquaintances. I haven't visited Michael and Ellen Field for several weeks, chiefly because i don't know how i can face them and have to tell them what happened. Yeah, i'm afraid that they'll think less of me; i'm afraid that i've lost my honor.
But that is just what God seems to be using this time to explain to me. I am a steward of what I have. What i've been through has had a big impact on me in the negative. What discernment can I acquire to impact my life later for the positive, and how can I impact the life of others for the positive? I had rather this time serve His purpose for my character than to have never gone through it hence be more stubborn in my prideful ways.
I cannot go back in time, but perhaps the future will bring similar decisions that i will make wisely because i am learning good habits now.
I don't know God's purposes for why life hits hard sometimes, but speculating does offer hope.
--
Saturday, I worked with my mom on her business' taxes, and what has, in the last four years, taken her weeks to accomplish was done in a day. I was glad to put my organizational prowess to good use. After spending six hours calculating, erring and recalculating, the reward in the form of pizza and a movie at the end felt very good.
---
Sunday. My sister's boyfriend broke up with her today. It was something my parents, some friends and I were just waiting for, so while we are rather glad for the breakup, we're sympathizing for her. She's been drowsy mentally all week because the aura of relationship problems was in the air-and that not at all for the first time. His presence as her boyfriend brought antagonism to her and my mom, and in the recent months the burden got beyond her and our tolerance. Dad formally asked Rosanna last weekend to break up with her boyfriend, and I wrote a letter to her three days ago appealing to her reason. On Monday, she and he had an afternoon of intense discussion about their relationship, and she went into his bathroom and fainted. A couple days ago, she and he had a conversation which they agreed to be less serious, as in they don't talk about marriage anymore. That didn't please my dad much. But yesterday, Rosanna went to a party and danced with a couple guys and told her BF about that. Today, she went over to his apartment and found all her gifts that she'd given him either packed in garbage bags or getting tossed outside. Classic language that "it's over." He's assumed that he's had ownership of her for 2 1/2 years. It broke him to see that he didn't. Rosanna brought her carload of things back home and walked promptly to bed. there's no telling when she'll be healed. God, forbid that they get together again.
Friday I got to go flying again. I had to, actually, because my 90-day period the insurance company covers for rental pilots was a week expired, but because of special permission from the FBO's flight instructor, i was allowed to fly anyway. Mom went with me for my 3 required landings, and that was all I did because I can come back later in the next 90 days. The next time i fly, however, it will be on a day when the eastbound runway is active, because when the the winds favor the north-south runway, I have to taxi a MILE each way to and from it! That's like ten bucks spent on renting an airplane that's not flying. How fun is that?
One improvement over the 90 days since i'd flown that airplane was my higher instinct for flying it. I'd spent 150 hours between a Navajo, 310 and Diamond Star, and now my touch and technique with the airplane was more refined, and I could really feel the skills happening naturally.
It seems that when we force our habits to adapt to more strain, we come back to those less demanding situations and find them much easier to cope with. I'm aware that this may illustrate the present state of my life. The strains of an unbalanced life deprived of employment, duty, and apparent motion force me to seek for significance and purpose independent of them. In this adversity, few precious ones have counseled me well, reminding me of what God requires of me and what is the essence of my purpose. In church this morning, we sang the song that paraphrases Jude 1:25: "To the only wise God our Saviour, be glory and majesty, dominion and power, both now and ever. Amen" It is provocative to consider that all the glory, wisdom and power belongs to God; only by His providential grace does he grant it to us, his creatures. We are just stewards of those attributes which are wholly God's own. On earth, we obtain wisdom and strength and honor, but as life itself is a gift, so our acquiring those attributes is a gift. It humbles me that I was and am still under the impression that , because I have lost what invigorated and fulfilled me for the time being, i will be less accepted and esteemed in the hearts of my friends and acquaintances. I haven't visited Michael and Ellen Field for several weeks, chiefly because i don't know how i can face them and have to tell them what happened. Yeah, i'm afraid that they'll think less of me; i'm afraid that i've lost my honor.
But that is just what God seems to be using this time to explain to me. I am a steward of what I have. What i've been through has had a big impact on me in the negative. What discernment can I acquire to impact my life later for the positive, and how can I impact the life of others for the positive? I had rather this time serve His purpose for my character than to have never gone through it hence be more stubborn in my prideful ways.
I cannot go back in time, but perhaps the future will bring similar decisions that i will make wisely because i am learning good habits now.
I don't know God's purposes for why life hits hard sometimes, but speculating does offer hope.
--
Saturday, I worked with my mom on her business' taxes, and what has, in the last four years, taken her weeks to accomplish was done in a day. I was glad to put my organizational prowess to good use. After spending six hours calculating, erring and recalculating, the reward in the form of pizza and a movie at the end felt very good.
---
Sunday. My sister's boyfriend broke up with her today. It was something my parents, some friends and I were just waiting for, so while we are rather glad for the breakup, we're sympathizing for her. She's been drowsy mentally all week because the aura of relationship problems was in the air-and that not at all for the first time. His presence as her boyfriend brought antagonism to her and my mom, and in the recent months the burden got beyond her and our tolerance. Dad formally asked Rosanna last weekend to break up with her boyfriend, and I wrote a letter to her three days ago appealing to her reason. On Monday, she and he had an afternoon of intense discussion about their relationship, and she went into his bathroom and fainted. A couple days ago, she and he had a conversation which they agreed to be less serious, as in they don't talk about marriage anymore. That didn't please my dad much. But yesterday, Rosanna went to a party and danced with a couple guys and told her BF about that. Today, she went over to his apartment and found all her gifts that she'd given him either packed in garbage bags or getting tossed outside. Classic language that "it's over." He's assumed that he's had ownership of her for 2 1/2 years. It broke him to see that he didn't. Rosanna brought her carload of things back home and walked promptly to bed. there's no telling when she'll be healed. God, forbid that they get together again.
posted by Radar | 2:40 PM
1 Comments:
Thanks for the encouraging comment on my blog; I'll catch up with yours soon.
R
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