San Diego blog: first thoughts and present concerns
Hi all -
i know it's been awhile since i've written here, but that doesn't mean i've been dead or braindead or stranded on an island or whatever. i've been very busy travelling seemingly everywhere a guy can go in three weeks, and most of it has been with my beautiful girlfriend Charisma. i hope to someday get my piece of mind onto my blog site, but for now you may want to visit hers at charismaka.blogspot.com.
meanwhile, i have been in San Diego with my family, and i basically hand-wrote my journals as i went ,so what i have to type up here is taken from those pages. so here's me in San Diego!!
July 31 - aboard flight 635, United Air Lines from O'Hare to San Diego
I feel a lot of growing up is happening in me. I've made a lot of mistakes, felt the guilt, and learned from the experience. Spiritually I feel growth happening too, as a fiercer battle I have to fight threatens to beat me or mold me. Also as I continue to love, honor and not be critical towards my loved ones, I train my behavioral patterns toward my future wife.
---
In San Diego now, my first experience on the southwest coast. There's palm trees and festivities, and wealth and prestige and famous people and places - all the richness of a vacation experience right before my eyes. For me, it's a chance at rest, renewal, reflection and refocus. It seems i've allowed myself to encounter alot of 'life" recently, having tripped and fallen and gotten up with bruises yet with a mind all the wiser. The hard part about going through life as such is that an escape from the guilt can hardly be made. I wish that "what's done" could get shoved behind my mind and emotions as swiftly as Time removes us from the thing done, but such is not the case for me for one reason or another. The issue remains stuck in my mind, and my attention remains on my issue, so in the bitter end I turn into a person probably partway stuck in my own mind. Scary to consider!
i wonder sometimes whether i'm just a specially designed mind and heart for some purpose God is planning for. I can't feel okay with my negligence or carelessness or impulsivity; I have to dwell on the error, feel for what it's teaching me, then go on and apply the lesson til I can say "That was a good first intention, but the alternate result was better than the first intended result." Sure God works everything out for the good, and I have to believe Him for that. Just until I understand how, fully, I struggle to maintain my joy because I'm so busy getting down on myself.
I wish that i felt the same purity and blamelessness I did before! Yet even then I had my own struggles which i have now overcome or grown out of. In theend, the real task is being thankful for that IS in my life. Charisma reminds me to think on what is real and what is happening, not on what may or has happened.
---
We are here in San Diego with mom and the Vemma Elite Club (of which she is a member) for a special conference to celebrate the vemma business and reward the important people that are its makeup. For the majority of you who don't know what Vemma is, i can tell you that it's a liquid full-spectrum vitamin and mineral supplement combined with a liquid extract of Eastern-grown mangosteen fruit. it's the most complete bio-available health supplement available, and the addition of the mangosteen makes it the richest source of antioxidants available.
The health revolution is the next big thing, we are convinced. As deaths and complications and unsolved issues dominate our perscription-drugged society, people are searching for alternative options, and the best place to go is straight to the solution: give the body the stuff it needs, and it will repair itself. I and thousands of people in many other countries believe Vemma is the answer. It's all-natural, tastes great, makes me feel great, and has a money-back guarantee. Visit my site myvemma.com/jonathantack for more proof/details.
The San Diego Sheraton is hosting us and our event, and I will get to see lots of the week's big features, but there is quite a bit from which Rosana and I will be excluded, such as aspecial dinner with the company president BK Boreyko on a yacht sailing in the San Diego bay, and a visit to BK's beach home.
...
i know it's been awhile since i've written here, but that doesn't mean i've been dead or braindead or stranded on an island or whatever. i've been very busy travelling seemingly everywhere a guy can go in three weeks, and most of it has been with my beautiful girlfriend Charisma. i hope to someday get my piece of mind onto my blog site, but for now you may want to visit hers at charismaka.blogspot.com.
meanwhile, i have been in San Diego with my family, and i basically hand-wrote my journals as i went ,so what i have to type up here is taken from those pages. so here's me in San Diego!!
July 31 - aboard flight 635, United Air Lines from O'Hare to San Diego
I feel a lot of growing up is happening in me. I've made a lot of mistakes, felt the guilt, and learned from the experience. Spiritually I feel growth happening too, as a fiercer battle I have to fight threatens to beat me or mold me. Also as I continue to love, honor and not be critical towards my loved ones, I train my behavioral patterns toward my future wife.
---
In San Diego now, my first experience on the southwest coast. There's palm trees and festivities, and wealth and prestige and famous people and places - all the richness of a vacation experience right before my eyes. For me, it's a chance at rest, renewal, reflection and refocus. It seems i've allowed myself to encounter alot of 'life" recently, having tripped and fallen and gotten up with bruises yet with a mind all the wiser. The hard part about going through life as such is that an escape from the guilt can hardly be made. I wish that "what's done" could get shoved behind my mind and emotions as swiftly as Time removes us from the thing done, but such is not the case for me for one reason or another. The issue remains stuck in my mind, and my attention remains on my issue, so in the bitter end I turn into a person probably partway stuck in my own mind. Scary to consider!
i wonder sometimes whether i'm just a specially designed mind and heart for some purpose God is planning for. I can't feel okay with my negligence or carelessness or impulsivity; I have to dwell on the error, feel for what it's teaching me, then go on and apply the lesson til I can say "That was a good first intention, but the alternate result was better than the first intended result." Sure God works everything out for the good, and I have to believe Him for that. Just until I understand how, fully, I struggle to maintain my joy because I'm so busy getting down on myself.
I wish that i felt the same purity and blamelessness I did before! Yet even then I had my own struggles which i have now overcome or grown out of. In theend, the real task is being thankful for that IS in my life. Charisma reminds me to think on what is real and what is happening, not on what may or has happened.
---
We are here in San Diego with mom and the Vemma Elite Club (of which she is a member) for a special conference to celebrate the vemma business and reward the important people that are its makeup. For the majority of you who don't know what Vemma is, i can tell you that it's a liquid full-spectrum vitamin and mineral supplement combined with a liquid extract of Eastern-grown mangosteen fruit. it's the most complete bio-available health supplement available, and the addition of the mangosteen makes it the richest source of antioxidants available.
The health revolution is the next big thing, we are convinced. As deaths and complications and unsolved issues dominate our perscription-drugged society, people are searching for alternative options, and the best place to go is straight to the solution: give the body the stuff it needs, and it will repair itself. I and thousands of people in many other countries believe Vemma is the answer. It's all-natural, tastes great, makes me feel great, and has a money-back guarantee. Visit my site myvemma.com/jonathantack for more proof/details.
The San Diego Sheraton is hosting us and our event, and I will get to see lots of the week's big features, but there is quite a bit from which Rosana and I will be excluded, such as aspecial dinner with the company president BK Boreyko on a yacht sailing in the San Diego bay, and a visit to BK's beach home.
...
I'm enjoying the experience so far. This has got to be the best hotel I've gotten to stay in, with its personnel who do everything to make us informed an comfortable, to our 11th-story room with a view of San Diego Bay. Our room has a patio looking out to the west to a harbor of a thousand yachtsand sailboats, and to the north of that is the San Diego airport, and straight beyond the harbor are hills bordering the next further coastline. The weather is a perfect 70-ish degrees and clear, and the air is fresh and aromic.
Inside is a fancy suite where my sister Rosanna and I will sleep and on our bed are each of our stuffed animals which our respective significant others have given to us - my Char the white tiger, and Rosanna's Ninja the brown dog. Vemma sent us up a little wooden boat filled with little snacks, Cardonnay and Vemma - decalled wine glasses.
I have a list of things i'd like to do during my stay here, which includes more than is possible, but it's best for me to have ideas to aim for. At lest the simple things like having a meal ordered up to our room and taking a walk along the boat harbor will be done without much hassle.
I am officially Rosanna's 'bodyguard' during this trip: wherever she goes, I'm to go too. Actually this is Nathan's idea which mom condones, although Rosanna prefers her independence.
Our flight there was interesting toward the end because the flaps had some mechanical glitch, and after circling to troubleshoot for 1/2 hour, we finally made a partial-flap landing at San Diego. The pilot still kept it smooth, but I could tell the brakes were giving their maximum effort during the rollout. At the gate, apparently when they tried bringing the flaps back in, a strange clicking and knocking sound came from the wing root area. Not good, I though. At least we mae our destination, though i feel for those passengers who were to leave in the plane after us.
Yes, sleeping is on the agenda for this week. Charisma (i just love seeing that name the more i type or write it!) and I didn't' get much during our time together, and last night I got about 1 1/2 total. So I'm tired and probably more emotional about being apart from Charisma than I should be. Nevertheless, I just wish she were here because I miss her dearly and appreciate her more now that she's gone. I just know she wants me to have a good time where I'm at, and that is what she really cares about.
Inside is a fancy suite where my sister Rosanna and I will sleep and on our bed are each of our stuffed animals which our respective significant others have given to us - my Char the white tiger, and Rosanna's Ninja the brown dog. Vemma sent us up a little wooden boat filled with little snacks, Cardonnay and Vemma - decalled wine glasses.
I have a list of things i'd like to do during my stay here, which includes more than is possible, but it's best for me to have ideas to aim for. At lest the simple things like having a meal ordered up to our room and taking a walk along the boat harbor will be done without much hassle.
I am officially Rosanna's 'bodyguard' during this trip: wherever she goes, I'm to go too. Actually this is Nathan's idea which mom condones, although Rosanna prefers her independence.
Our flight there was interesting toward the end because the flaps had some mechanical glitch, and after circling to troubleshoot for 1/2 hour, we finally made a partial-flap landing at San Diego. The pilot still kept it smooth, but I could tell the brakes were giving their maximum effort during the rollout. At the gate, apparently when they tried bringing the flaps back in, a strange clicking and knocking sound came from the wing root area. Not good, I though. At least we mae our destination, though i feel for those passengers who were to leave in the plane after us.
Yes, sleeping is on the agenda for this week. Charisma (i just love seeing that name the more i type or write it!) and I didn't' get much during our time together, and last night I got about 1 1/2 total. So I'm tired and probably more emotional about being apart from Charisma than I should be. Nevertheless, I just wish she were here because I miss her dearly and appreciate her more now that she's gone. I just know she wants me to have a good time where I'm at, and that is what she really cares about.
posted by Radar | 4:06 PM
1 Comments:
yay a new blog!
wish I could have been there with you.
and remember I'm proud of you and standing by you always.
Charisma
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