What a Days
I'm going to have a difficult time giving a well-done account of this weekend. What i know about times like this is that i need to write what comes first to mind. An author of a splendid book wrote that we need to write the best of what comes to mind right now and to not 'save' it for later. Unlike tangible things, the best thoughts often die in the process of holding them back.
What i'd like to point out first is my amazement, my bedazzlement at the way God works things out. My heart rests tonight in the confidence that Anthony is really a great guy, and he's a great guy for Daisy. She is, I do affirm, in good hands. I hung out with them both on Friday, Saturday and today (Sunday) and had a blast. We went to the Alaska state fair on Saturday and did everything together-shop, eat, watch shows, walk and talk to people. And the behavior between them has turned...affectionate. Daisy made ham and onion omelettes and toast for everyone for Saturday's breakfast, and since Anthony and i were the last to rise, we were the last to eat. So i got to eat breakfast with A and D, and i was encouraged with both the little details of that arragement. One, Daisy waited to eat her own food until Anthony came to eat his, and two, i tilted back in my chair and saw that Daisy had her feet resting on Anthony's. Then to and at the fair, they were holding hands and hugging and touching at almost every moment. Anthony and I had private conversation for an hour that day. Then this morning, I took him flying to the Knik gorge and to Hal's strip; Hal then drove us to church. I flew my 400th flight hour with A
nthony, and I am honored to have achieved that landmark with him. Yes, i think Anthony and Daisy are in each other's capable hands. I'm much more at peace about them as girlfriend and boyfriend now than i had afore imagined i would be. I told Daisy tonight that i wish i would have gotten to know Anthony better a lot sooner this summer. And you know what? She said that she wished the same for herself. Elmo, that's our confirmation that we made a difference in Daisy's life this summer. We were the catalysts for change. Glory to God! She told me as she left tonight that she wants to tell me more about that. I'll need to remind her of her intentions.
At the fair, I bought some cold-weather clothing (ski hat and gloves), postcards, a very special hoodie for my sister, and found lots of NOAA (Nat'l Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration) pamphlets and info. I saw a 942-pound pumpkin, an 642-pound cabbage, a pea pod weighing 0.1 po
und, a 569-pound squash, a 200-pound watermelon and lots of other overgrown veggies. A few flowers that were especially pretty were the Dahlia, Digitalis and Deliphilia. Daisy told me some about her 4H experience, the livestock her parents own, and other fairs she had been to. I talked to other cool people, like the snowmachine dealer who sells 400 snowmachines from just the Anchorage store, and Cal and Lynn who took and sold pictures for Eagle Eye Helicopter photography. Go check them out at www.eagleheli.com and see pictures of my stomping grounds. A and D and I watched the lumberjack show, a motorcyle show, a pig auction and so many little things. I'm so thankful for this time with Anthony and Daisy. God knows that I needed it! My conversations with Anthony opened up my eyes to his gifts of discernment, considerateness, spiritual strength and integrity. I wrote this poem Saturday night--
Daisy is hitched, and her man is wise.
This setup I was wrong to despise.
I know I couldn't have taken her for myself
So I'm putting that thought back on the shelf.
They're good, they're great together.
Now they hold and hug and touch each other.
As for me, i know it's just a matter of time
Before the next enchantment so sublime.
Soon it will be the real thing and all will rhyme.
Before leaving Hal's to fly back to the ranch, i spent quiet time with God (Psalm 46:10), during which he identified to me this feeling inside that swells when Daisy leaves: Loneliness. You think that since other people are around me all the time, loneliness wouldn't set in. But no; a person needs a unique sort of other person to fill that need for companionship. Daisy was in many ways precisely that, and that's why i miss her so much. God will Himself be sufficient for my needs, and soon the time will be right to quench, in accordance with His design, that craving for the companionship of a daughter of Eve who's perfect for me.
----
Then something else came of this weekend. That's Shane. Long story short, he was driving into Palmer yesterday afternoon and looked away while driving and rearended somebody. The investigating police found his invalid license, lack of insurance and an empty bottle of alcohol and ticketed him for all of it. Then his car was towed to be impounded. He walked down to fair and found us, and yesterday and today has been spent trying to deal with this new flux in his life. We watched two movies together tonight: Waterworld and Les Miserables. They were his choices, and their themes spoke well to Shane's situation. Waterworld is about having faith in great things that no one alive has seen, and Les Miserables is about helping others who cannot help themselves. There's a great spiritual battle in his mind right now. On the one hand is real humility that admits he's fallen short and needs help from people, especially his sister whom he is tempted constantly to despise. On the other hand is stubbornness to abide in his own ways by which he's been living and failing for 18 years. The latter is comfortable to him, which is what the enemy often exploits to our demise. Pride, hate and fear is comfortable to a fallen heart. The consequences of all is where we lose. "Sin always steals" says the song So Blue by Downhere.
Pride is prevailing, I am thankful to say. He sat with Daisy alone and had a talk with her, i beleive to ask for help. You see, usually he is being offered help by Daisy, but rarely to never does he ask for help from her. But he did it tonight. God, cause Your love to come and permeate Shane during these trying days.
As you can imagine, poor Daisy was in agony over her brother last night. She cried harder than i had seen her before, and Anthony knew well enough to let her alone with her tears, (you all know me; i w
oulda been squeezing her and rocking with her on a secluded park bench and holding her head on my shoulder as she cried out her distress) so he didn't try to offer much soothe at first. Coming back to the ranch, we stopped on the side of the highway becuase she felt she needed to throw up and relax a little. I felt some words of encouragent coming to me when i got back in my room, so i took my Alaska paper pad outside and wrote a letter to her.
--
The ranch gang and Hal, exept for A and D, went to Long Rifle lounge for lunch. Hal payed my way.
--
I love being by myself in the cabin. It's real seclusion and quietness. I have my computer on my lap as i type, nice music in the background and my new hat on to keep me warm. The strains of loneliness are pleasantly diminished in moments like this.
--
Daisy's fishwheel caught 117 fish on Thursday. That's the picture.
--
Good night and God bless
What i'd like to point out first is my amazement, my bedazzlement at the way God works things out. My heart rests tonight in the confidence that Anthony is really a great guy, and he's a great guy for Daisy. She is, I do affirm, in good hands. I hung out with them both on Friday, Saturday and today (Sunday) and had a blast. We went to the Alaska state fair on Saturday and did everything together-shop, eat, watch shows, walk and talk to people. And the behavior between them has turned...affectionate. Daisy made ham and onion omelettes and toast for everyone for Saturday's breakfast, and since Anthony and i were the last to rise, we were the last to eat. So i got to eat breakfast with A and D, and i was encouraged with both the little details of that arragement. One, Daisy waited to eat her own food until Anthony came to eat his, and two, i tilted back in my chair and saw that Daisy had her feet resting on Anthony's. Then to and at the fair, they were holding hands and hugging and touching at almost every moment. Anthony and I had private conversation for an hour that day. Then this morning, I took him flying to the Knik gorge and to Hal's strip; Hal then drove us to church. I flew my 400th flight hour with A
nthony, and I am honored to have achieved that landmark with him. Yes, i think Anthony and Daisy are in each other's capable hands. I'm much more at peace about them as girlfriend and boyfriend now than i had afore imagined i would be. I told Daisy tonight that i wish i would have gotten to know Anthony better a lot sooner this summer. And you know what? She said that she wished the same for herself. Elmo, that's our confirmation that we made a difference in Daisy's life this summer. We were the catalysts for change. Glory to God! She told me as she left tonight that she wants to tell me more about that. I'll need to remind her of her intentions.At the fair, I bought some cold-weather clothing (ski hat and gloves), postcards, a very special hoodie for my sister, and found lots of NOAA (Nat'l Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration) pamphlets and info. I saw a 942-pound pumpkin, an 642-pound cabbage, a pea pod weighing 0.1 po
und, a 569-pound squash, a 200-pound watermelon and lots of other overgrown veggies. A few flowers that were especially pretty were the Dahlia, Digitalis and Deliphilia. Daisy told me some about her 4H experience, the livestock her parents own, and other fairs she had been to. I talked to other cool people, like the snowmachine dealer who sells 400 snowmachines from just the Anchorage store, and Cal and Lynn who took and sold pictures for Eagle Eye Helicopter photography. Go check them out at www.eagleheli.com and see pictures of my stomping grounds. A and D and I watched the lumberjack show, a motorcyle show, a pig auction and so many little things. I'm so thankful for this time with Anthony and Daisy. God knows that I needed it! My conversations with Anthony opened up my eyes to his gifts of discernment, considerateness, spiritual strength and integrity. I wrote this poem Saturday night--Daisy is hitched, and her man is wise.
This setup I was wrong to despise.
I know I couldn't have taken her for myself
So I'm putting that thought back on the shelf.
They're good, they're great together.
Now they hold and hug and touch each other.
As for me, i know it's just a matter of time
Before the next enchantment so sublime.
Soon it will be the real thing and all will rhyme.
Before leaving Hal's to fly back to the ranch, i spent quiet time with God (Psalm 46:10), during which he identified to me this feeling inside that swells when Daisy leaves: Loneliness. You think that since other people are around me all the time, loneliness wouldn't set in. But no; a person needs a unique sort of other person to fill that need for companionship. Daisy was in many ways precisely that, and that's why i miss her so much. God will Himself be sufficient for my needs, and soon the time will be right to quench, in accordance with His design, that craving for the companionship of a daughter of Eve who's perfect for me.
----
Then something else came of this weekend. That's Shane. Long story short, he was driving into Palmer yesterday afternoon and looked away while driving and rearended somebody. The investigating police found his invalid license, lack of insurance and an empty bottle of alcohol and ticketed him for all of it. Then his car was towed to be impounded. He walked down to fair and found us, and yesterday and today has been spent trying to deal with this new flux in his life. We watched two movies together tonight: Waterworld and Les Miserables. They were his choices, and their themes spoke well to Shane's situation. Waterworld is about having faith in great things that no one alive has seen, and Les Miserables is about helping others who cannot help themselves. There's a great spiritual battle in his mind right now. On the one hand is real humility that admits he's fallen short and needs help from people, especially his sister whom he is tempted constantly to despise. On the other hand is stubbornness to abide in his own ways by which he's been living and failing for 18 years. The latter is comfortable to him, which is what the enemy often exploits to our demise. Pride, hate and fear is comfortable to a fallen heart. The consequences of all is where we lose. "Sin always steals" says the song So Blue by Downhere.
Pride is prevailing, I am thankful to say. He sat with Daisy alone and had a talk with her, i beleive to ask for help. You see, usually he is being offered help by Daisy, but rarely to never does he ask for help from her. But he did it tonight. God, cause Your love to come and permeate Shane during these trying days.
As you can imagine, poor Daisy was in agony over her brother last night. She cried harder than i had seen her before, and Anthony knew well enough to let her alone with her tears, (you all know me; i w
oulda been squeezing her and rocking with her on a secluded park bench and holding her head on my shoulder as she cried out her distress) so he didn't try to offer much soothe at first. Coming back to the ranch, we stopped on the side of the highway becuase she felt she needed to throw up and relax a little. I felt some words of encouragent coming to me when i got back in my room, so i took my Alaska paper pad outside and wrote a letter to her.--
The ranch gang and Hal, exept for A and D, went to Long Rifle lounge for lunch. Hal payed my way.
--
I love being by myself in the cabin. It's real seclusion and quietness. I have my computer on my lap as i type, nice music in the background and my new hat on to keep me warm. The strains of loneliness are pleasantly diminished in moments like this.
--
Daisy's fishwheel caught 117 fish on Thursday. That's the picture.
--
Good night and God bless
posted by Radar | 11:00 PM
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